KRDL ENGINEER ACHIEVES BREAK-THROUGH!

I wrote this article for April Fools' Day, 1998.

PRE-PRESS RELEASE
1 Apr 98
 

KRDL ENGINEER ACHIEVES MAJOR BREAK-THROUGH
Grandmother Cell discovered

In what could be the greatest scientific break-through in Singapore's history, an engineer in the Kent Ridge Digital Labs (KRDL) has discovered the elusive Grandmother Cell, almost by accident.

In Neural Networks terminology, "Grandmother Cells" are highly specialized single neurons that seem to fire in response to certain complex objects in the world, such as one's grandmother.  Previously, the most complex "grandmother cells" are known only to respond to simple objects like cats and dogs.  This is the first time a
"grandmother cell" is found to actually respond to a grandmother.

The discovery was made this morning by senior engineer, Mr Tan Chade Meng. "It was amazing, I found it almost by accident!", said the strikingly attractive young engineer.  It started while he was working on improving the nerual network used for his team's ID Recognition System.  "I found one strange neuron that would fire continuously for no apparent reason.  Most engineers would just throw it away, but I picked it up and investigated it further".  Mr Tan later discovered that the particular neuron was responding to the photograph of his extended family on his desk.  Further research revealed that it was actually firing in response to the picture of his grandmother.  "I knew then
that I struck gold!  I have found the Grandmother Cell!".

Further confirmation of this discovered was made when it was shown that the neuron could recognize the picture of Mr Tan's grandmother even with a mustache and beard drawn on with a magic marker.

Fellow researchers are equally thrilled.  "Wow, it even recognizes my grandmother-in-law!", exclaimed fellow researcher and close friend, Mr Chng Tiak Jung.

With this discovery, plans are underway to discover the Grandfather Cell.  "It is a difficult research problem", said Dr Zhou Ruo Wei, also Mr Tan's good friend, "Grandmother and Grandfather cells are very different, it is a research that may take up to 10 years".

Plans are also underway to patent the Grandmother Cell.  One application could be a grandmother-detector.  Nobody has yet figured out why anybody would want such a device, but Business Development people are working on it.

For his discovery, Mr Tan would get one pat on his back.
 


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